My Weight Journey-Struggling This Week!!

Posted by admin on August 21, 2014

My week with my weight: Ups and Downs, Ins and Outs, Odds and Ends, crazy times and good times.  This week has been like that for me :-)  The ups:  I got to go school supply shopping with my kids for the 75 backpacks that my church is giving away on Saturday at the Springbrook Apartments near the YMCA!!  Plus, I had the privilege to go get raffle prizes from businesses for the event, and I must say we have some pretty cool stuff for the Back to School basket!!  The family, who gets this package is going to be very happy!!

Then there's the downs.  I am really struggling this week with my weight loss lifestyle change.  I haven't worked out, other than shopping (because believe me, shopping for that many supplies is somewhat of an exercise), and my pull up challenge stuff, so that has brought my energy level down.  Plus, I was fortunate to get to go to the Guardians of the Galaxy in the lovely Cinetopia Living Room, since we found there were Groupons; however, we got a voucher for the concessions, which we usually put towards a pitcher of beer, but they changed it-it was only good for the concession stand.  Instead of just saying, alright, we'll just get a small popcorn, or a water, instead we got the largest popcorn they had, because we of course wanted to use the entire dollar amount, and I ended up eating about half of that!!  Plus we still got our beer, which was delicious!!  Let me tell you though, I felt it the next morning for sure!! All day I was very aware of my low energy level, even though I had a couple of coffees, and consciously felt a bit depressed the next day.

In Weight Watchers this week, we discussed our challenge areas, and my biggest one is watching TV at night with Alex, we always want to grab a snack.  We have been finding ways to conquer this, such as making sure we're not watching cooking shows, unless we're eating dinner; doing something while watching TV, or lately, we haven't been watching TV because we've both been busy with our new blogs.   It's fun to have both of us pursuing our passions and dreams!! After going to the movie though, I realized that this is an area that I need to go into with a PLAN!!  I had been doing pretty good for a while, and I think it's because watching habits of myself and others at the movies started to disgust me!!  I used to do what everyone else did:  You go to the movies, and get a drink, popcorn, and candy-it's almost un-American if you don't!!  Last summer, I really started fighting this.  I would bring a piece of gum for each of my family members, and I would get us a water, although we found out most theaters will just let you bring one in.  I think the reason I let go of it this week, was just that I didn't have a plan, and then when I was assaulted with the SURPRISE that we NEEDED a concession item, I didn't think, I just reacted!!  AND Out came the popcorn!! (I'm totally saying this in my head with the old jack-in-the-box song :-) )

Acknowledging my weaknesses has been a huge step forward for me, and as we were discussing our weak spots this week in my meeting, I realized how much I have grown.  I no longer need to go to Burgerville for a milkshake or hot fudge sundae every time I go run errands, because I just want a "little treat" for all that I am doing; I no longer need to have a Caramel Frappacino every time I go grocery shopping, because I like having a drink in my hands when I shop-I mean they put cup holders on the carts for a reason, right?; I no longer have to devour a piece of cake, plus my child's, plus go for at least seconds AND lick the frosting off of the cake pan while I'm there, when I go to birthday parties, because I just feel like indulging "just this once!!"  Having a plan and changing my old habits with new ones has been a huge step for me!!  I didn't realize the prison I was living in with all of these fattening habits!!  I have so much more freedom now, but I do know, and definitely recognized this week, that I still need to be vigilant, and aware that I can get side stepped at any time!!

IF I DESIRE TO FEEL BETTER, I HAVE TO REMEMBER WHY I AM DOING THIS!!  My reasons in a nutshell are this:

1) I want to feel better!!  I hate the feeling of overeating when you go to bed and can't sleep because you're so full you just want to throw up. OR not being able to participate in things my family wants to do because I know I can't do it physically!!

2) I want to be a good example to my kids!!  I don't want them thinking adulthood consists of getting fat, and sitting around watching TV the rest of your life!!  I want them to know that an adult can still have fun, can still pursue their passions, and can do anything they want to do-hiking, biking, and whatever else they choose!!

3) I want to look the way I see myself in my head.  Remember in the Matrix how NEO was told that he would look the way he perceived himself in the Matrix?  Well, I was kind of doing that in real life.  In my head I looked a certain way, but then I would see myself in pictures, and be like, "WHOA!! WHO IS THAT CHICK?  IT CAN'T BE ME!!"  It was a sad reality that was hard to face!!

4) I don't want to be fighting this battle when I reach my 40's!!  I have been overweight since I had my beautiful daughter, BUT that was already 15 years ago!!  It's time to move past this to other things in life!!

Please don't take these personally if you are struggling with your weight!!  I know that I am a beautiful woman, and I am more confident today than I ever was when I was a teenager and super skinny and fit!!  So, I encourage others to love themselves at whatever weight they are at, in fact, I think it helps in the weight loss process, but this is how I feel about myself!!  This is the battle that I want to win!!  The things that my family wants to do in the next few years truly requires it of me, or I will DIE!!  LOL, but it's true!!

So there's my rant for the week about my weight...How about you?  How are you doing on your weight loss program?  Do you have problem areas that you need a plan for or a new habit?  What are your reasons for losing weight?  Chime in.  I think those of us making these kinds of large changes need to stick together and support one another!!  I would love to join you on your weight loss journey :-)  May you have a refreshing and exhilarating week!!